Your Teen's Birthday Party | Help Me Host It | Party Ideas, tips and more.

Planning

You are the proud parent of a teenager. You daily deal with pimples, cell phone, texting has replaced conversation, attitude and hormones… And now you have to throw them a party??? Oh the trials of parenthood. But seriously, when you think back on your own youth, it's the parties you had as a teenager that we remember the most. And we want to perpetuate that with our own kids. But teenagers seem to be evolving - they are different than we were in so many ways. What may have been cutting edge and trendsetting for us is seriously old-fashioned now. So, for this event we decided to go straight to the source - teenagers themselves. We're hosting a group on Facebook that has posed a question to the teen members - what's a cool party? And as their responses evolve, so will this page. But what we want every parent to take from our content here is that it IS possible to have an amazing teen event without inappropriate or illegal behavior - here are some basics and some amazing ideas!

What is your "Party Picture"?

When planning for Teens there are a lot of considerations.

How many guests will there be?
Will it be gender specific or co-ed?
Where will it be and what will you do to keep the group occupied?
How will you chaperone?
How much are you willing to spend?

Understanding Teens: Teenagers are budding adults. They are beginning to have adult tastes, a strong sense of independence, and are experimenting with life. But at the same time, there is still a strong need for approval and acceptance by peers. It's a complicated time - but when it comes to a party - basically what the typical Teen is going to want is a party that everyone will have fun at and be talking about Monday at school. And what parents need to remember is that memorable doesn't have to be expensive or over the top. There are years that you may opt to do the huge event, such as for a Sweet Sixteen, but other years, you can do something cool that doesn't break the bank. Talk to your son/daughter and ask them what their Party Picture is. They may have several different ideas that sound cool - explore them all. Do they want a few close friends that they do something cool with, such as an amusement park? Or do they want a medium sized group over for a slumber party? Or are you going to invite the entire soccer team for a night of pizza and bowling?

Be the voice of reason here - if your child isn't the most popular, steer him/her towards a smaller party doing something cool so that there won't be expectations and disappointment if there isn't a huge turnout. If your child is hugely popular and 20 guests will probably turn into 50, steer them towards an offsite venue that can accommodate a crowd!
Note, depending on the maturity of your son/daughter, they may still be in the realm of Tween at 13/14 - read both sections and decide which is more appropriate for you child and their friends.

Your role as parent will be to have your wallet in hand, be prepared to veto, and to help your teenager explore fun, creative ideas that are appropriate and memorable. Then plan on getting out of the way! Have a space where you can keep an eye on your crowd - and let them know that there will be the periodic check-in, but then you can stay in the background so that your teenager can have fun with their friends.

There are a lot of different opinions on how teens should be able to party - some parents opt for the hands off approach, some require strict chaperoning. However, there are certain lines that shouldn't be crossed even if you want to be the "cool" parent. Alcohol and drugs should be absolutely forbidden. It is not only illegal for your child to have them, but it is illegal for you to serve or enable the ingestion of either. You can take the position that "if they don't do it here, they'll do it somewhere" but - that's a cop out. You can have a great party with fun, cutting edge things that are cool and trendy, and even if the crowd is the type that would drink somewhere else, they won't need to at your event.

Teenagers are old enough to have some great party options. They can head to an amusement park unattended, an adult venue with a kid twist like an adult oriented arcade is great. There are also clubs that cater to the over 16 crowd that can accommodate events. Or, you can crate a "club" at home or at an offsite location with trendy entertainment, fun catering and incredible music. Finally, you may have the quieter teenager, where having a well planned and inspired slumber party may be a blast! The rules are out the window at this age and the party is really driven by what your son/daughter wants to do and what you can comfortably accommodate (venue and sanity…).
No structure! Teenagers aren't going to want a party schedule with events or activities. The party should simply flow. You can have entertainment or activity centers (like a pizza bar or sundae bar, or a video game area) but by this age we're pretty much done with structured activities.

Talk to your child before the party and have some activity ideas. If there is a lull and some momentum needs to be infused into the party then have a plan to inject it without "Mom" setting up Bingo.

Don't inflict family and friends on teenagers at their party unless you are hosting a huge family event. Nothing kills mojo for a teenager more than having to include cousin Sally. Leave family politics at the door - come up with an excuse if you need to.
What's your Party Picture? Now that you've thought about the unique life of the Teenager, the next question is, what's your Party Picture?

Are you going to let everyone snack or will you serve a meal?
Will you be at home or offsite? If at home, will you include outdoor space?
How much have you budgeted for the party? Decorations, refreshments, entertainers, venue, activities, favors…. Factor it all in so that you aren't worrying about the cost on the day of your party.

If you are unsure how many attendees to plan for (vice invitations) ask other parents what they have experienced to get an idea what your attendance will be. Factor in holidays, weather, and honestly, how cool your party is. An offsite at an awesome venue will typically result in a greater "yes" RSVP response than a home party.

Picture it! - Take pictures! Print them! Share them!

Teens are just as excited about pictures of their party as you are. They want pictures of their friends and the memories they made during their party- they've seen the scrapbook and can't wait for a new page! There are so many "must have" pictures that go with these birthdays. To make sure you get each picture, spend some time creating a photo plan before the event begins to ensure that the photos and video that you want happen, and that it inconveniences you, or your designated "photographer" as little as possible.

You're not going to be all that welcome at this party - so standing around snapping pictures isn't going to be the best way to do this. However, you can include some inexpensive digital cameras or disposable cameras in your party venue - and sneak in periodically for a few photos. Also, you can provide a nicer camera to a guest you trust to take care of it and ask them to play the role of photographer for you. Talk to you son/daughter - chances are they want the pictures too and will have some ideas on how to get them.

Consider hiring a photographer. A simple event that lasts a few hours is not going to have the price tag of an elaborate wedding. A professional photographer for an hour or two ensures that you capture the big moments exceptionally!
If budget is a concern, consider replacing your teen's periodic professional sitting at your local photography studio with a professional photographer for your event. You'll end up with several amazing candids to replace your usual posed picture. And as children get older, these candid moments will mean much more to you than the pose in front of a blue fabric backdrop!
Have cards with the address to your party page or photo page on-line so that you can load all the pictures that were taken and each guest can download the ones they want. These memories are priceless, so share them!

Theme

Even Teenagers can appreciate a Theme!

Okay, so when I say "Theme" I don't mean cardboard cut outs on the wall for this age group. These are young adults, so treat them like that. What would you want for your party? Try a more mature Theme - something that would be interesting for their age, but doesn't seem childish. Consider exploring our Adult Themes and then adapt it for a younger crowd. You can still have signature cocktails (sans alcohol) and a great buffet - a DJ or even a live band! Just keep it a little younger and make sure your teen is in on the planning and okays everything.
When selecting a Theme for a teenager, consider what's in at the moment. But it won't be a character or movie at this age. Rather, it will be a "Lounge" setting with a focus on music, or a "Movie Premier" with a theater focus, or even a Fiesta with something to replace the XX beer with lime that adults would enjoy.

Tip: Your theme will be a success if it makes the teenagers feel like they are at a party young adults would host and attend. It should be sophisticated and grown-up but still fun.

Once you've chosen a theme, incorporate it into everything - invitation, venue, decorations, tablescape, music, food, drinks, even your activities and entertainment.

Venue

Depending on your child's popularity, this may be a party of 5 or of 50 - determine the potential size of your party and then discuss venues. Hosting a large group of Teens in your home can be really exhausting - and hard on your furniture! Not to mention the task of chaperoning everyone. If your not up for the task, take your party SOMEHWERE ELSE!!! There are TONS great venues for Teens where OTHER people set up, clean up, and entertain your guests. Consider some of these options:

Movies and a Pizza party - if there is a great new movie coming out, make a party of it. Go out to a 7:00 show and then ask the local pizza restaurant if they can stay open for an after movie pizza and soda gathering.
An arcade such as Dave & Busters that is geared toward adults and teenagers.
Bowling alleys - many bowling alleys have late night bowling on Friday/Saturday nights with trendy music and pizza. This is a great opportunity for a fun, supervised party that doesn't break the bank of destroy your possessions.
Amusement parks - this age group is old enough to take to a large amusement park. Have adults on hand to herd everyone and keep them together though!
Concerts - Get tickets to an upcoming concert that your son/daughter and their friends will enjoy. Have them select a few close friends and then wind up after the concert at your house for a sleepover. You will earn "best parent" points for quite a while.

The cost for the offsite venue is at least partially offset by what you would have spent on decorations and entertainment at your home (not to mention it is a LOT less work!).
If you select a venue offsite, coordinate cost per guest with the venue and determine how many guests you can include. Also, some venues charge admission per adult as well so determine how many "chaperones" your party requires and coordinate with RSVP'ing parents.

If a parent does not feel comfortable leaving their child at the venue you selected ask if they can assist with the party and supervision.

HOWEVER, if you're daring, you can do this at home. The key is to make your guests forget they are at someone's house. It's about creating an atmosphere - turn your basement into a Club, turn your backyard into an outdoor concert, turn your Family room into a Screening room… You can't just pull in a couple of chairs plop down a bucket of popcorn and call it a party.
For smaller parties celebrating less critical birthdays, consider a slumber party. Let your child grab some movies and have a room devoted to your guests. A buffet set up with amazing treats, music, some fun activities to start the party, then let them settle in and entertain themselves. Video games, movies, make-overs, karaoke and music - all of these are great for Teens.

Slumber Party with Movies: select a couple of the most popular new releases (avoid R rated movies for younger teen parties).
Slumber Party with Video Games: Amazingly, boys never actually outgrow videogames. A simple guy party for a 14 or 15 year is a room with a couple of TVs and videogame systems. Pick up the latest games, and you'd be surprised how content a room full of boys will be!
Slumber Party with a Spa theme: For girls, listening to music, texting friends, and having a "Spa" evening would be memorable. You can keep it simple with elements for manicures, pedicures and facials, or you can even bring in a masseuse or make-up specialist to teach the girls how to improve their application techniques. Have everyone bring their favorite music and it's a party to remember.
If you have a pool, this is the time to use it! Give teenage girls a chance to wear bikinis, and teenage boys the chance to admire them, and you've got a party. Barbecue, sodas on ice and some music finishes this perfect at home party.

Invites

The invitation sets the mood, even for teenagers. Get creative - a CD mix with party details or party details on a card attached to a bottle of nail polish for a Spa night…
Include party details - the basics are an obvious (time, date, who, where…), but have a note highlighting any special needs like a change of clothes, bathing suit or sneakers.
Invitations go out 2 to 3 weeks before your party.
Include a link to your Party Page with party details, directions, and RSVP information.
Send an e-mail "Party Reminder" a week before the event - this will provide an electronic version of your party details and directions in case the original gets lost.
Track RSVPs and don't forget to ask if there are any specific needs or concerns for the guest coming (such as food allergies!)
A group picture as the Thank you card is a great memento of your party and a personal way to say thank you for coming and the present you brought.

Decorations

Decorations - A couple of balloons or the whole enchilada, it's up to you!

What is your theme, and where are you having your party? This determines the scope of your decorating options and needs. If you are offsite, chances are you only need minor embellishments and table accoutrements, but if you are at home it's a whole different enchilada!
What is going to bring your theme to life? What details will inspire excitement in these Teens and get their party mojo going? Do a little research on your theme - and inject those details in to your party.
Select three or four colors that you will primarily be working with - this defines your color scheme and helps keep the surroundings looking exciting, not chaotic.
Walls, furniture, lighting, centerpieces, linens, chair backs, tablescapes (see below), even the ceiling and floor can all work into your decorations. No surface is off limits when it comes to decorating!

Don't forget the entrance! This is your "first impression" so make it pop!

Incorporate your food, beverages, and even your entertainment into your decor.

Tablescapes - Your tables are your prime real estate, maximize the effect!

Teens aren't going to sit down for a meal - you're lucky if you get them to eat to begin with. Chances are they are going to "graze". Getting these kids to a table, sitting down, using utensils is going to be like herding cats. Actually, herding cats in a room full of rockers… So, don't bother trying. Set up an amazing buffet and let them come and go. Although it's absolutely acceptable to establish a few rules - like where they have to eat and drink - saving your carpet and furniture!
Incorporate your table into your theme. Color coordinated serving pieces or creative so
lutions really set off a table. Add a few touches of style to make it pop.

Food

Refreshments - The heart of the party, amusingly, is the stomach!

Teens are probably starting to explore more sophisticated fair, so you can get a little creative. However, keeping it simple is still probably your best choice. Have a variety that will appeal to any palate - an Under the Sea party with just Sushi is probably going to leave some of your guests hungry.

Finger food is still excellent veggies with dip, hot dogs, chicken nuggets with fun dipping sauces, burgers, pizza - all work for teenagers.

Try some refreshment options that are a little more grown up:

A coffee bar with hot cocoa, coffee, and delicious additions to go in both
An Oxygen bar with flavored hits of air (yep, people pay good money for this…)
Wings or nuggets with sauces that would appeal to more grown-up tastes (at some point we do all outgrow ketchup!)
Build your own burger bar with more than just american cheese and lettuce.
Smoothies/Slushies - have fresh fruit, ice cream, yogurt, juice, etc. for guests to create their own drinks. Have a book of tried and true combinations available for those that just want something good.

Cooking…. Although it's your Teen's party, you are still going to have a lot to do. You do not want to spend the entire time in the kitchen. Make it ahead, buy it pre-cooked, have "helpers" in the kitchen, or just have it catered - do whatever you need to do to stay out of the kitchen so that you can be part of the party instead of stuck in the kitchen. Consider several options:

Make ahead dishes that only require reheating or mild prep work.
Pick up pre-made food from your favorite restaurant, grocery store or deli. At most you have a little reheating to do.
Order delivery - it is the rare child that doesn't like pizza!
If you are truly doing it up contact a caterer and ask about their experience catering events for teens. It's amazing what caterers can come up with to tempt the palate of even the most picky eater.

Because Teens have longer parties (or even all night parties), you can't just heat it all right before the party. Food will get cold or can go bad. To make sure everything goes off without a hitch, have a refreshment plan. This allows anyone offering you an assist in the kitchen to understand exactly what is needed, and when. Include the following:

How the item needs to be prepared (baked, micro-waved, mixed, tossed, etc.)
When it needs to be prepared and how long it will take (provide specific cooking instructions).
What it will be served in and when it will be presented to the guests.

You never outgrow cake. But your cake can grow up. Have your son/daughter help you pick out something delicious and fun for their party.
Refreshments can fit your Theme!

FunStuff

Entertainment - When you want more than just your stereo…

Back to the same basic question - what is your theme and where is your party? If you are at an activity based venue, you don't typically need additional entertainment because the venue provides it. However, if you are at home, do you want to add an additional entertainment element?

Your best bet is the music - a DJ or band can really add that extra wow factor to your party!
Consider a dance instructor for hip hop, swing dancing or even a little sexy latin music. If you are having a co-ed party and don't want the group entertained by spin the bottle, you have to give them something else to do - and this is just the ticket.
Caricature artists - you never outgrow this and it's a great party memory.
A make-up artist who can do inspired face painting
The possibilities are endless - browse our vendors and entertainment section for ideas that will work with your child's interests and your party site.

Activities - Get people talking!

Activities for Teens is difficult because they are too old to have structured games and activities, or, at least think they are, but you want them to keep busy. Sit down and look through both the kids activities list and the adult activities list - there are a lot of options that would work well for this in-between time. Some good options include:

Photo Albums - decorate them, have note cards and a computer/printer to have picture fun.
A video game station
A graffiti wall (cover a wall with butcher paper and have great markers and sharpies available). Take a picture of the group in front of it as a souvenir and then the rolls of paper themselves become a memento for your child.

Prizes/Favors

A little something to remember your event by…

Kids, adults, teenagers - the party favor has become the norm for everyone. But for teens, a bag of candy won't do. Pictures, CDs, T-shirts, fun Theme inspired trinkets - get creative.